My Drinking Revelation: The Day That Moderation Took Over

May 10, 2012 § 6 Comments

My latest revelation in life has come very late, but that doesn’t mean that it’s too late.  I mean, revelations don’t come to you in the beginning, they come to you somewhere in the middle.  When a revelation comes to you in the “beginning” that’s not a revelation, that’s just preparation.

I had a revelation and last night and maybe it would have been nice to have thought of this ten years ago, but there is still plenty of time to apply this to my life going forward and I am excited to see the results.  I honestly don’t feel like a lot people will be able to relate to this and I can already picture some of you judging me for it, but I don’t care because I have already had a revelation about people judging you: It doesn’t matter and you shouldn’t give it 1% of your attention or energy.

Judge away.

Last night I went out with some friends.  It was $2.50 margarita Wednesdays at Barragon’s in Echo Park and I wanted to join in on what my friend called: “Wednesday Buck Buck.”  (Buck as in “Buck Wild” but in this case we would actually be going double that… “Buck Buck Wild.”)

The name alone had sold me that I wanted to join in on the festivities.  I want to be a part of Wednesday Buck Buck!  The only problem is that it’s Wednesday.  And it’s in Echo Park.  And that’s not close to my house.  And I have to be at work by 8 AM.  What to do?

I had two choices in front of me: Go Buck Buck and force myself to wake up at 5:30 AM to beat traffic and get ready for work or dial it down two notches, simply go “Wednesday Bu Bu,” and drive home.  I opted to just dial it down a notch, keep it cool, keep my wits so that I could drive home in time to get a couple hours of z’s and head off to work.

It was a revelation.

Some of you are probably saying “I don’t see what the big deal is?” but this is where the part comes that you judge me for.  I don’t go half-ass on drinking.  EVER.  I went to Washington State University and that means something.  Maybe its a reputation that some alumni don’t like, but people that go to school there go hard in the paint.  They go h.a.m.  That shit cray.  They whistle while they twerk.  We back dat azz up.

Sorry, I got distracted for a minute.  But seriously, we drink.  There’s nothing else to do there, it’s a small town in Eastern Washington and the entire population of the town is basically 20,000 college students and seven teachers.

There are two movie theaters.  The closest town is Moscow, Idaho and it might as well be the more famous Moscow in Russia, which is probably more prosperous.  So we drink and we drink and we drink til we sleep and that habit has been with me ever since.

Some people would say I was an alcoholic but I went two years without drinking after I graduated and it wasn’t a conscious choice, I was just in a relationship and I never felt the need to.  You could probably call me some kind of alcoholic though based on how I drink, but I don’t know.  And I don’t care.  But all I know was that last night felt different.

I drank my margaritas in moderation and I took it slow.  I enjoyed conversations, talked with friends, laughed, broke up fights, and had a good time.  Most of all though, I noticed the behavior of women towards me and that was weird.

It was weird because they were flirtatious and I was holding conversations and I sort of felt like I had this new control.  Not because they were drunk, because they weren’t, but because I wasn’t drunk.  I was simply myself but with a little kick.  I was like a Bud Light Lime.

For the first time since… maybe ever… I was in control of myself while I was out drinking with my friends and I absolutely loved it.  I leaned over to my friend, a guy that I know has already mastered the technique of drinking in moderation and told him about the revelation I was having at just that moment and he simply said, “Oh yeah.  I’ve had that revelation and it’s fucking amazing.”

Last night I had to control my drinking because I had to drive home at the end of the night but from now on I am going to control my drinking because I want to.  I am going to take control of my drinking because it’s going to help me take control of my life.  I am going to control my drinking and maybe make less an ass of myself in front of the ladies at the bar and maybe next time get a phone number and not text terrible messages at 3 AM.

I want to mark this moment, May 5th 2012, as the day that I start the “experiment” known as “Kenny’s Controlled Drinking” and I will relay my results back as they come.

Wish me luck!

I mean, wish me buck buck!

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