Want To Help Me Write My OkCupid Profile?

May 17, 2012 § 10 Comments

I think it’s time for a shake-up on my dating profile.  I haven’t been very active on it lately and I haven’t been active on the dating market in awhile, period.  In my experience, success begets success or in other words, I either get a shitload of messages all at once or complete tumbleweeds.

Since I’m in the tumble-zone, I’m game for whatever.  You wanna get nuts?  Let’s get nuts.

In the past I’ve considered simply writing the worst profile ever but for whatever reason I get writers block on OkCupid.  As a writer, I should be able to eloquently and beautifully describe myself, who I am, my soul and my desires.  Instead its more like “Hi there, me Kenny, so horny.”

Instead, I am down to experiment with some different ideas for dating profiles.  Is there anything that you think I should try?  Anything you’d be interested in seeing what would happen?  I’ll possibly do it and then show you the results.  I don’t mind being a guinea pig and I am willing to embarrass myself and bring shame to my family name.

If you’re unfamiliar with OkCupid, here is the format of the profile:

My self-summary

What I’m doing with my life

I’m really good at

The first things people usually notice about me

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food

The six things I could never do without

On a typical Friday night I am

The most private thing I’m willing to admit

I’m looking for

You should message me if

Then of course you put up photos and answer questions.  I might be willing to try some new photos out too!

Should I write something really honest or just have some fun with it?  Should I write from the perspective of perhaps a famous person or a hipster or a banana?  I don’t give a crap, just tell me!

Also, if you’re a girl in the L.A. area, why haven’t you hit that “CONTACT” button on the left?  Send me a message!  Or even if you’re not in the area, I got time to read an e-mail.

Oh and if you want to satiate your curiosity, you can find my profile here. If you’re a dude  or if you’re my mom, please don’t click that link and make it awkward.  But do suggest what you want me to try out because I’m single and ready to tingle!

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§ 10 Responses to Want To Help Me Write My OkCupid Profile?

  • desi83 says:

    Just be as honest and eloquent as possible without writing so much that the girls’ eyes glaze over. Answer every question, and say something funny, like maybe in the most private thing you will admit question. State what you want from the experience. It’s just obnoxious if a guy is anything but honest and articulate on those sites. I’m on match b/c most guys on okc are just on there to hook up, or at least that is how it seemed.

  • Mr X says:

    I spent two spells using dating sites in the past, using OK Cupid but also Plenty Of Fish. They’re both free, who wants to PAY for it?

    In my experience, I found that Plenty of Fish was much better than OK Cupid. Not as a website, OKC looks much prettier and user friendly than the extremely basic POF, but I found two key things.
    1) A large majority of OK Cupid users use it as a social media site, rather than for Dating. I rarely met anyone who was actually willing to meet up on that site so I stopped wasting my time on it. You’re there to meet Women in real life after all, not over a Computer.
    2) POF, whilst it’s very basic, appeared to have so many more Members than OKC did. And these Members were keen to meet-up in person once you strike a rapport.

    My first spell at Online Dating was a disaster. I never got approached and instead always had to send the first message. Getting a reply was often difficult and like you mentioned in this blog post, I always got writers block when writing my profile and sending first messages, despite being a writer.

    I gave up, but ended up going back to it about a year later. I had some new ideas but first I created a fake profile posing as a Woman. It was pretty convincing but I did it to see what it is like from a Woman’s point of view on a dating site, and in particular POF.

    I was astonished to find that Women were getting between 10 to 30 messages a day from Men. I never sent anyone a message on the site, just set up my profile and left it.

    99% of the messages were plain terrible. You got the boring “hello baby how are you”, the disturbing “i want to fuck your face in” to the triers, who put their heart and soul into a first message only for it to reveal how needy and desperate they are.

    This was validated by some Female friends who were also on the site, two of them in particular deleted their profiles because they were receiving messages from desperate Men in abundance.

    That is when the Penny dropped. I have to stand out from the crowd.

    It took me about a week to write up, after a few drafts but I had written a new profile for a new dating profile.

    It was witty, silly, mysterious and raised curiosity. That, combined with a few decent Photo’s worked wonders.

    After a week, it was me who was getting messages every day from Women and it was Me who was able to be selective and choose which Women I would go on a date with. A complete U-Turn.

    I hope this helps.

    • Wow. Super interesting and informative. I don’t know why I never tried PoF. I think it’s blocked at my work, when I spend the most time online, but I should give it a shot and spend some time thinking of the perfect profile.

      Nice work on getting the females perspective and thanks for the information!

      • Mr X says:

        No worries dude. I’ve been in your shoes. If you want, show me your Profile once you finish it and I can give you a few pointers, if needed.

        Kill the bunny. #Swingers

  • rebexy says:

    Coming from the female perspective on dating sites, I’ll say I can appreciate this perspective (and the effort you put in Mr X). You see so much of the same old, over and over again (it’s either nerds that say way too much, or pretentious pricks, that say way too much). A little mystery goes a long way. As a female, writing to a male I’m maybe attracted to, not having every piece of the puzzle laid out is refreshing. As is humility. If I could pick two things that’ll snag me every time, it’s mystery and quiet humility.

    And don’t lose heart. Occasionally, dude will email me that he wants to fuck my face and I seriously consider it. Hi there, me Rebecca, so horny.

  • Andrius says:

    I just happen to stumble across this blog while in search for ideas to beef up my okc profile. I also just checked out your profile. You have nOt answered a single question. Why dont you just start there.

    btw – youre a good looking man. I’d hit it, two times, with the lights on…jk

    • Andrius says:

      Oh shit. I was so wrong. I was not logged in which is why I am unable to view your questions, etc. bleh.

  • chaiwithsy says:

    I think your blog is on point and hilarious. I’ve been following you for awhile and appreciate a man’s perspective on this whole dating bit. I recently wrote a post about dating deal breakers which might apply to both genders. check it out and help me rule the world: http://chaiwithsy.wordpress.com/2012/08/20/dating-deal-breakers/

    keep doing your thing and it’s ok if you consume 551 calories. ;)

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