Coming Up: The Most Magical Vegas Trip Ever

September 11, 2012 § 7 Comments

There are a few things that I love in this life (none of which is a “girlfriend”) and now no less than two of those things are coming together this weekend.  Actually, now that I think about it, considerably more than two things will come together from Thursday-Monday and here are those things that I love:

  • Football
  • Gambling
  • Las Vegas
  • Drinking
  • Washington State University Cougars
  • Regular cougars
  • Poker
  • Friends
  • Staying in a hotel
  • Plane rides
  • Sun
  • No open container laws
  • Bars owned by Jimmy Buffett
  • Bonus rounds on slot machines
  • Did I mention, football, drinking, poker, friendship, Cougs, and not having to go to work for 3 business days?

If you haven’t connected the dots yet, I’ll be in Las Vegas from for five days for the purpose of seeing my beloved Washington State Cougars take on UNLV in a college football game.  It’s pretty much the most amazing thing that’s ever happened to me because I can’t believe I’m seeing my favorite team play in one of my favorite cities.  Vegas being one of my favorite cities because I am a degenerate gambling addict.

I don’t want to brag, but I’ve nearly gambled my life away several times playing poker.  No big deal.

Seeing as though I’m going with friends that haven’t spent any time playing poker, let alone marathon sessions of 18 hours, I probably won’t spend much time on the tables.  But that’s fine because did I mentioned what I mentioned up there?  How could all of these beautiful things be happening at once?

Have you ever seen two dolphins make out under a tree that grows money while a double rainbow lights the sky and angels play Israel Kamakawiwo’ole’s version of “Over the Rainbow” on harps?

Have you ever taken a bath in perfectly-temperatured chocolate sauce with the scent of fresh baked cookies in the air while the cast of Saved by the Bell feeds you the most amazing carne asada tacos you could imagine?

Have you ever woken up one morning to find that your bank account had been flush with more cash than you could ever spend, your beer gut had been transformed to a Ryan Gosling eight-pack, your novel was completely finished while publishers fought over the rights, your favorite childhood pet was alive again and nuzzling on your face, with a text message from your first major childhood crush that says, “Miss you!”?

Combine all those things and double it and that’s how amazing this trip is going to be.  But, you know, I’m trying to keep my expectations low.

Since I will have my laptop with me anyway because I’ll have to do some writing work while I am on vacation, I will try to do some updates along the way.  It will probably go something like this: “Made it!” followed by, “Tihs IS sooo23oo muhc FOUN! DRUUNKing!” and then, “Holy hell, what happened and why did I send those text messages?” before, “Lost everything! Payday is a long two weeks away :(” until, “Let us never speak of this again.”

They say that what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, but technically the internet is in Las Vegas so we’ll see what kind of updates I can put out, if anything cool happens.

As if.



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§ 7 Responses to Coming Up: The Most Magical Vegas Trip Ever

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