10 Sex Facts and Statistics, Both Interesting and Informative

April 30, 2012 § 9 Comments

Have you ever wondered how you stack up, sexually?  Are you doing it frequently enough, with enough different partners, getting enough diseases, and packing enough heat?

These are the types of questions that I either wonder about or that will, more importantly, bring more viewers to my site.  Search engine optimization, baby!

Professor Alfred Kinsey founded the Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender, and Reproduction in 1947 and heavily influenced how Americans view sex and sexuality.  Even through controversy, studies like the ones done at the Kinsey Institute helped break down walls and show that what you were doing behind your bedroom door wasn’t that much different than what your neighbors were doing so don’t feel so bad about it.  In fact, let’s have a key party.

If my hair parted like that, I'd become a sex scientist too.

Today, sex studies are done with greater frequency and answers are able to come with more accuracy (hopefully) based on the fact that we’re less shy about saying what we do and with whom we do it.  For the most part it doesn’t matter if you’re gay/straight, virgin/Kardashian, kinky or straight-edge.

Just be yourself.

But how close is “yourself” to everyone else?  Let’s look.

Men Average 6-8 Sexual Partners in Their Lifetime, Women Average 4

According to a 2005 study by Mosher, Chandra and Jones, people aren’t slutting around nearly as much as I thought they were.  Or are they?  According to a study by Norman Brown, women claim eight partners in their life and men reported… 31.

Brown admitted that the the high number of sexual partners reported by men was probably false, whether intentional or unintentional, based on the fact that men don’t have the same connection with a sex partner as women do.  A woman is more likely to recount all of her sexual experiences, while a man might feel the need to guesstimate based on how much he had to drink those nights.

In the movie “Whats Your Number” with Anna Faris and Chris Evans, Anna’s character is concerned after reading that you’re far less likely to get married if you have more than 20 partners in your life (for women.)  Welp, she slept with Joel McHale and that was number 20 so now she HAS to marry someone that she’s already banged.  (Why does she HAVE to?  Don’t you know that COSMO is science?  Or it might have been because this was a terrible fucking movie, even for an Anna Faris rom-com.)

Is 20 partners “slutty” for a girl, though?  If you’re mostly single until your 30 and you’re sexually active starting at 20, that’s only two partners per year.  It’s not the sluttiest thing that I’ve ever heard of.  An average Paris Hilton will average 20 partners in the time it takes you to read this sentence.

What’s the real average?  It’s hard to know for certain but 8-10 sounds fair for women and 20 sounds fair for men, but now I’m just guessing based on those rules from American Pie 2.

75%-85% of Men are Cumming While Only 29% of Women Show Their O-Face

Thought you did your job well when she trembled in desire?  She probably just desired a better experience and was humoring you.  According to National Health and Social Life Society, not only do less than a third of women reach orgasm, but far fewer actually do so from vaginal intercourse.  Sorry guys.

According to National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior (NSSHB) 85% of men report that their partner came the last time that they had sex.  While only 64% of women say that they actually did.  (So the number is between 30 and 64%?)

My advice is that if you want to make your lady go crazy, start working on those “ABC’s”.

Are You Touching Yourself Enough?  Too Much?

Well, in my opinion, there is no way anyone could masturbate too much!  At least, there isn’t a “too much” if I want to keep thinking that I’m normal.

Here are charts provided by the Kinsey Institute:

Masturbating Alone

AGE 18-19 20-24 25-29 30-39 40-49 50-59 60-69 70+
Men
Past Month 61.1% 62.8% 68.6% 66.4% 60.1% 55.7% 42.3% 27.9%
Past Year 80.6% 82.7% 83.6% 80.1% 76% 72.1% 61.2% 46.4%
Lifetime 86.1 91.8% 94.3% 93.4% 92% 89.2% 90.2% 80.4%
Women
Past Month 26% 43.7% 51.7% 38.6% 38.5% 28.3% 21.5% 11.5%
Past Year 60% 64.3% 71.5% 62.9% 64.9% 54.1% 46.5% 32.8%
Lifetime 66% 76.8% 84.6% 80.3% 78% 77.2% 72% 58.3%

I find it interesting that 94.3% of men age 25-29 admit that they have masturbated in their lifetime, the highest of any age range.  Making ages 25-29 the most honest age range in your lifetime for men and women.

The highest rate of masturbating for women also is between ages 25-29, the only mark in which over 50% of women say that they have rubbed it out in the last month.

What about mutual masturbation?

Masturbating with a Partner

AGE 18-19 20-24 25-29 30-39 40-49 50-59 60-69 70+
Men
Past Month 14.5% 15% 20.5% 22.9% 19.2% 14.4% 10.3% 4.1%
Past Year 42% 43.5% 49.3% 44.7% 38.1% 27.9% 17% 12.9%
Lifetime 49.3% 54.5% 69% 68.3% 61.5% 51.9% 37% 31.6%
Women
Past Month 18.4% 16.1% 24.1% 19.3% 12.7% 6.7% 5.9% 2.1%
Past Year 36% 35.9% 48.2% 43.3% 34.8% 17.7% 13.1% 5.3%
Lifetime 38.8% 46.9% 64% 63.1% 56.1% 46.9% 36.4% 17.5%

It appears that over half of us will share our private time with a partner, so if you haven’t done it yet you better get on it.  Ladies, if you haven’t and you’re concerned about that, my number is 555-2424.

Over Half of Us Will Get an STD

Last night on the show Girls on HBO, the issue of “HPV” was at hand.  (Yes.  I watch Girls and if it wasn’t funny (which it is) I would still watch it because of Brian Williams’ daughter, my new soulmate, Allison Williams:

)

So, HPV… Is it something to be concerned about?  Yes.  HPV can cause cervical cancer and kill you.  But just getting HPV isn’t the end of the world.  Facts from the CDC:

HPV is passed on through genital contact, most often during vaginal and anal sex. HPV may also be passed on during oral sex and genital-to-genital contact. HPV can be passed on between straight and same-sex partners—even when the infected partner has no signs or symptoms.

In most cases, the body fights off HPV naturally and the infected cells then go back to normal. But in cases when the body does not fight off HPV, HPV can cause visible changes in the form of genital warts or cancer. Warts can appear within weeks or months after getting HPV. Cancer often takes years to develop after getting HPV.

HPV (the virus). Approximately 20 million Americans are currently infected with HPV. Another 6 million people become newly infected each year. HPV is so common that at least 50% of sexually active men and women get it at some point in their lives.

Genital warts. About 1% of sexually active adults in the U.S. have genital warts at any one time.

Cervical cancer. Each year, about 12,000 women get cervical cancer in the U.S. Almost all of these cancers are HPV-associated.

That’s over 50 percent of people having HPV but only 1% even getting genital warts.  Many men have HPV and there’s no way to be sure that a guy does or doesn’t have it because there’s no test for men.  The best thing that a woman can do is be safe and if you do get HPV, getting regular screenings for cervical cancer, but having HPV isn’t a big deal.

So don’t feel bad you dirty sluts and perverts.  Also, 25% of us are living with an STD that can’t be cured.  Uh oh.

It’s Estimated That Over Half of All Time on the Internet is Spent on Things Related to Sex

Like this very article that you’re reading right now!  But mostly, I’m guessing, spent on Bangbus and YouPorn.  According to a study by Vincent Yoder, “Internet Pornography and Loneliness: An Association?” most of the time spent online is spent there so that we can fulfill our 90% rate of masturbating.

Sadly, yes, there was also a “significant association” between loneliness and internet pornography, so rather than going to Brazzers after you read this article, let’s be friends?

Think the Sex Will Die Down When You Get Married?  Yeah, It Probably Will

According to a German study, only about half of women still have a high sex drive after four years of being in a committed relationship.  The number continues to go down as the years go up because the initial high sex drive is to solidify bonding with her new man.

The odds on Frequency of Sex for Men and Women:

Percentage of Men Reporting Frequency of Vaginal Sex, N=2396
Age Group
18-24
25-29
30-39
40-49
50-59
60-69
70+
Single
  Not in past year
56.9
46.6
39.6
48.9
67.7
86.4
81.6
  A few times per year to monthly
13.9
21.9
24.2
18.4
14.9
8.6
5.3
 A few times per month to weekly
19.0
27.1
23.1
22.4
11.6
3.7
13.2
 2-3 times per week
8.0
4.1
1.7
8.0
5.3
1.2
0.0
 4 or more times per week
2.2
0.0
5.5
2.3
0.5
0.0
0.0
Partnered
Not in past year
26.0
20.8
15.6
29.9
34.1
27.3
26.3
A few times per year to monthly
8.0
10.4
6.5
9.2
10.6
11.4
10.5
A few times per month to weekly
30.0
36.4
32.5
24.1
31.8
20.5
63.2
2-3 times per week
26.0
27.1
39.0
25.3
18.8
38.6
0.0
4 or more times per week
10.0
6.3
6.5
11.5
4.7
2.3
0.0
Married
Not in past year
4.2
1.6
4.5
9.1
20.6
33.9
54.2
A few times per year to monthly
12.5
9.3
15.6
16.2
25.0
21.2
24.2
A few times per month to weekly
16.7
46.3
47.3
51.0
38.3
35.4
15.0
2-3 times per week
45.8
37.1
26.8
19.9
15.0
9.5
5.8
4 or more times per week
20.8
5.9
5.8
3.7
1.1
0.0
0.8
Percentage of Women Reporting Frequency of Vaginal Sex, N=2393
Age Group
18-24
25-29
30-39
40-49
50-59
60-69
70+
Single
  Not in past year
50.8
43.0
72.3
71.1
85.4
84.5
100.0
  A few times per year to monthly
16.4
21.5
10.7
16.9
5.4
6.5
0.0
 A few times per month to weekly
19.7
24.1
12.5
9.9
7.0
6.5
0.0
 2-3 times per week
8.2
1.3
4.5
2.1
2.2
2.6
0.0
 4 or more times per week
4.9
10.1
0.0
0.0
0.0
0.0
0.0
Partnered
Not in past year
12.9
10.6
14.8
20.6
21.1
14.8
30.8
A few times per year to monthly
16.1
11.7
13.6
13.7
18.3
11.1
15.4
A few times per month to weekly
31.2
36.2
43.2
24.5
36.6
48.1
23.1
2-3 times per week
32.3
28.7
18.2
31.4
18.3
18.5
7.7
4 or more times per week
7.5
12.8
10.2
9.8
5.6
7.4
23.1
Married
Not in past year
11.8
3.5
6.5
8.1
22.0
37.9
53.5
A few times per year to monthly
14.7
11.6
16.3
21.7
23.7
20.0
25.4
A few times per month to weekly
14.7
47.7
50.2
46.6
36.2
35.9
18.3
2-3 times per week
35.3
35.2
21.9
20.8
16.9
6.2
1.4
4 or more times per week
23.5
2.0
5.1
2.7
1.1
0.0
1.4

There isn’t one single woman over 70 that’s having sex?  That’s definitely a demographic that I’m going to have to take advantage of when I turn 30 70.

If You Cum Inside a Woman After She Orgasms, It Increases the Odds of Pregnancy

Well, I don’t have any concerns about that happening to a girl that’s with me!  The orgasmic muscles in the pelvis will help push the spermies closer to the eggies.

So, if you’re married and trying to get pregnant, spend more time on her and less time on yourself when your rubbing your thingies together.  However, if you are having sex with someone that you don’t want to get pregnant, wear a condom or if you’re like me, just keep doin’ what you’re doin’.  According to a study, 0% of women have orgasms with me.

The Average American has Sex Over 100 Times a Year

Man, I really forgot what it was like to be in a relationship.  The most recent study I found said it was 103 times per year on average.  That sounds like a lot, but how far behind am I in having sex 103 times a year since being single?

Well let’s do the math:

Number of times I’ve had sex this year + number of times I’ve kissed a girl divided by number of times I’ve watched Star Wars – number of minutes I’ve spent trying to figure out Game of Thrones X the number of times I’ve eaten a fun size Laffy Taffy = …

It appears that by my calculations I need to have sex 104 more times this year in order to reach the average of 103.  Wait, what?

Small Dick?  Hey, Let’s First Measure the Vagina!

The average vagina is 62.7 mm in circumference with a range of 40-95 mm.  If you’re girl is complaining that it’s like a hot dog down a hallway or a pencil in a volcano, don’t be afraid to measure the hallway and the volcano.

Maybe her hallway is more like a ballroom.  (An even better analogy since you could mention that there’s actually enough room for your balls to go in there too)

“Hey, this is like putting a nuclear warhead inside of a giant ballroom!”

Yeah, that’ll show her.

Okay, What You Really Want to Know About is Dick Size, Amirite?

My independent study has found that every other study has something about dick size.  It seems to be the number one concern for all men and therefore to keep traffic coming to these sites, everyone mentions the dick size.

I mean, the size of my dick has been a concern to me too.  When I was 11, maybe.

The real answer here: If you get a girl to the point where she’s actually touching your dick, you’ve won.  Unless you have micropenis, put it in the back of your mind and if you do have micropenis, most girls are going to be satisfied more by what you do without your dick.  Hell, there’s a lot of girls out there that don’t want to have sex at all (From my experiences with women, I know this to be true!)

And women, I really don’t give a shit how big your boobs are so on the flip side you need to stop trippin’ about that, too.  If a woman actually lets me see her boobs, she’s got me wrapped around her little finger.

But since you asked about dick size: 5-7 inches and almost 5 inches around.  Feel better now?  We know this because of many studies conducted by hundreds of scientists that measured dongs, like this one at the Kinsey Institute.  Dr. Erick Janssen measured over 300 dicks during a five year period and for his sake I hope he’s straight because otherwise he would have been in dick heaven and nobody would have gotten any work done.

Now if you’ll excuse me, Allison Williams has raised the average masturbation rate by 5%.

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